Diagnosis Day

November 23 started like any other Tuesday.  The alarm went off at 5:11 AM and I hustled into the bathroom to change into my workout clothes.  Yes, workout clothes.  I have had a long standing date with the YMCA most weekdays for 5:30 AM.  I do not remember my exact workout that day.  For some reason, I do remember the outfit I wore to work that day – brown pants and a green Ann Taylor sweater (last year’s Christmas gift from my brother and his wife). 

As usual, I was walking in the door to work by 8:30 AM, pleasantly greeting those who were already here.  By 10:30 AM, my day had been flipped upside down.  The call I received at 10:30 AM went something like this:                                 

“Alexis, this is Dr. Penman.”             

“Hi Dr. Penman.  How are you?” – me all bubbly assuming good news.    

“Well, lil lady.  It seems you have a lil breast cancer.  You need to come see me today at 3.”                   

“Okay, I’ll be there.”  – and commence freak out mode!

Time seemed to stand still as I alternated calls between Brian and my mom.  Um, why was no one picking up their phone at the one moment in my life when I needed to talk?  Finally, I reached Bri.  I’m not sure exactly what I said, but I do know that those two calls to Brian and my mom were the only times I said out loud, “I have breast cancer.”  Everyone else was either told by email or by my mom or Bri.  I am thankful that I’ve only had to say it twice because it just feels so weird to say it or tell people. 

Bri and I stayed at work that day.  I needed something else to focus on and work helped.  We met each other at my surgeon’s office and and the only thing that I kept thinking of was that my outfit made me look like a tree (brown pants & green shirt).  Why would I be thinking about that, not sure.  We met with Dr. Penman and listened to her explain everything and the recommended treatment plan: first a lumpectomy, then chemo, and radiation.  There were a lot of details explained to us and it was a lot of information to take in at once.  In Dr. Penman’s words, they were “going to beat me up for a few months.”

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